Dayton has now failed his car seat test three times. Reid passed his second one and is now cleared to come home tomorrow, Wednesday June 12. Dayton had three chances to pass his car seat test, which they did every 24 hrs. Now they will do it again in three days. If he fails that one too, they will wait 5-8 days. I feel like it could take a month to get this finished. I am SO SO SO excited to have my little Reid home, but I am so sad to leave Dayton in the NICU. It is going to be a challenge for me to leave Reid at home with someone so that I can go to the NICU to spend time with Dayton. It breaks my heart and is causing much anxiety. I don't want them to be apart, and I don't want to only have the option of leaving a baby no matter where I am. I can't wait to get them home together so we can start our family routine.
My dad is coming home from leave on June 24, and I'm a little nervous Dayton won't be home by them. It was so important to me to have both boys home when my dad came. This entire pregnancy and birth has not gone like I thought it would. I wonder how long it will take me to learn that I cannot plan things like this.
The thing that upsets me is that I was mentally prepared to have the babies in the NICU until their due date. I was doing such a good job at taking it one day at a time. Then the Dr and nurses started talking about how the boys would be home soon, and then they gave me a day. Now it's like they got my hopes up. I don't even want to believe Reid is coming home until I have him in the car seat and we are walking out the door.
It's not anyones fault, this is part of the journey and Dayton is just having a set back. I knew this could happen. The NICU staff has been great. They are a part of Daytons and Reid family and support system. I made the right choice when I decided to deliver at this hospital.
I'll keep updates on the boys, especially Dayton's next test.
Aww. I can appreciate your frustration. This is just another test to strengthen your faith and your skills at being a mommy. You're doing GREAT, and I don't know anyone else that is better suited to handle this than you and Nik. Y'all are amazing and I am praying for all FOUR of you. Dayton will be home soon enough. Lots of Love!
ReplyDelete-Aubrey
Goodness...kids can sure bring immense joy, but also immense anxiety and sometimes pain. You mixed bag of emotions is certainly understood, and I can appreciate how you must be feeling. I hope every thing goes well today (Wed) with getting little Reid home - and soon his big brother will be joining him!
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